What comes to mind when you think of self-care? The term is a trendy one these days, especially in the world of motherhood. When I used to hear “self-care”, I would think of hour-long massages, relaxing on a pristine beach, and candlelit baths. While these things are nice, and certainly nothing to scoff it, this image of self-care is often overwhelming to the postpartum mom because it feels unattainable. And holding this as the ideal vision can cause many new moms to dismiss the entire idea of self-care. By all means, if any of these things fit into your life, go for it. You absolutely deserve to care for yourself this way. I shared ideas for nurturing yourself in 30 minutes a while back. But lately I’ve been thinking about the postpartum mamas who have days when they can’t even seem to carve out 30 minutes. Today I want to re-frame the conversation about self-care and re-define what self-care looks like. If you can’t make space for the more time-intensive and elaborate self-care practices, I want to share some ways in which you, as a brand new mama, can care for yourself each day.
Affirm yourself. When you do have some time, jot down a few affirmations and hang them around your house. Now you’ll see these every day, and they encouragement they provide will be a thread that runs through even the most overwhelming of postpartum days. Check out our Facebook wall for lots of postpartum affirmations. We post one each Monday.
Remember to breathe. When you find yourself with even a moment of rest, or when you find your stress or anxiety level rising, begin to get in the habit of taking a couple deep belly breaths. Inhale all the way down into your belly and imagine it inflating like a balloon. When you exhale, picture the air coming out of it as it gently floats away. These deep breaths will send a signal to your body that you’re not in an emergency and they will help you find your center again. The more you practice this, the more naturally it will come.
Step outside. Even if it’s just for one quick moment, try to step outside and get some fresh air. This can be surprisingly rejuvenating.
Indulge. Have something to indulge in each day, whether it’s a great piece of chocolate, your favorite cup of tea, or an afternoon cup of coffee, try to enjoy it mindfully, even if you’re feeding or soothing your baby at the same time.
Reach out. Call a friend to chat for a couple minutes. Call your trusted postpartum support person and tell him/her if you’re having a hard day. Ask your partner to make you food, do a chore, or hold the baby for a few minutes. These moments of connection and vulnerability will remind you that you’re not alone and that you’re loved and supported.
Each of these things takes less than 5 minutes. While you will ideally work some longer periods of self-care into your week, these simple self-care practices can carry you through the days when you can’t make time for anything else. I really hope you will commit to trying at least one of them, perhaps adding more in as each becomes a habit. I think you’ll find your postpartum days to be more peaceful and fulfilling when you remember to take tiny breaks to care for yourself.