My first child was born via cesarean. I had a bit of time to prepare for this, as he was breech and I knew that if he didn’t turn head down, I’d be having a cesarean. (I couldn’t find a provider who would attend a breech birth). However, this was not what I wanted. And I was still relatively unprepared for what the experience would be like during and immediately after the birth.
I had a long drive by myself last week and I took advantage of the opportunity to listen to a book on tape, uninterrupted by a baby demanding my attention. Isn’t it amazing how 7 hours in the car suddenly sounds luxurious when you get to do it alone? It was actually a pretty enjoyable trip, due in large part to the entertainment. I’ve been wanting to read Bossy Pants by Tina Fey for a while, and finally got a copy of the audio book for my drive. If you haven’t read or listened to this book I highly recommend it. It’s hilarious, witty, and sometimes even illuminating. What made me think about my work with NMP was Tina’s discussion of the rules of improv.
Raise your hand if you had some ideas about the type of parent you were going to be before you had a baby. My hand is way up high in the sky. I had a lot of ideas about the kind of mother I was going to be. I also had a lot of ideas about what I would think about being a mom. Namely, I thought I would really like it and feel like a rock star. No one had really described to me, in a way I could hear, how humbling and challenging being a parent can be.
Dear Exhausted New Mom,
If you can identify with any of the following, read on:
It’s a new day and, as you get up in the morning, you wonder how you’ll make it through. And to be honest, it doesn’t even really matter that it’s morning because you sleep and wake at all hours in accordance to the baby’s schedule. And “making it through” is almost moot because once the day is over you know you’re in for another night of frequent waking.
Whenever I talk to older moms about how things are going for me they inevitable remind me to enjoy every moment because time flies. So, I’ve started pre-empting folks by stating, “I know time will fly,” or “I’m trying to stay in the moment.” But the truth is, for me, not every moment is really worth remembering.